Life in the Warehouse

Today was great day! I reported this morning to my first day working in the warehouse at the Second Mile Mission in Stafford, Texas. For those of you who haven't been following along too closely, this is a volunteer gig, which I plan to perform every Thursday.

My "boss" is a guy named Tom, who is a retired Army officer. He was a Lieutenant Colonel I believe. He's on staff, which means that this is his real job, although I'm sure he sees it more as a ministry than a profession. Tom is a really good guy, and he was happy that I actually showed up this week. I was supposed to be there last Thursday, but Kadesh got in the way. Anyway, Tom showed me around the warehouse and gave me my first assignment - supervising three juvenile offenders who were performing community service to work off their debts to society. There was Bob, Omar, and Xavier. Our task was to take the extremely large amount of groceries that had been donated by employees of the U.S. Postal Service and sort it into four categories - cans, glass, paper goods, and plastic. I'd never really spent any time hanging around juvenile offenders performing community service, so I thought I'd strike up a conversation with Omar, a Hispanic youth who is fifteen years old.

Me: So, Omar, how many hours do you have to work off?
Omar: Dude, I got to do 300 hours!
Me: 300? Wow! How many have you already finished?
Omar: Dude, 24.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Omar starts every sentence with the word "dude".

Me: So what did you do to warrant 300 hours of community service?
Omar: Dude, I stabbed a dude at school with a pencil.
Me: (trying to sound casual) Really! Where did you stab him?
Omar: Dude, in the chest. It went in pretty deep, too. And then I broke it off. He had to go to the emergency room.
Me: Hmmm, imagine that . . . Why did you stab the dude in the chest?
Omar: Dude, because he made me mad.
Me: Do you always stab people with something when they make you mad?
Omar: Dude, no, just when they make me really mad!
Me: So, Omar, is this your first bout of community service?
Omar: No dude, it's my third one.
Me: What were the others for?
Omar: Dude, my last one was for throwing a chair at a teacher.
Me: I guess she must have made you mad?
Omar: Yeah, dude . . . REALLY mad?
Me: Have you considered trying something a little less violent when you get really mad?
Omar: Dude, not really.
Me: So, I guess you like community service?
Omar: No, dude, but it's better than doing a year in juvie.

I didn't have this type of meaningful conversation with Bob or Xavier, although "X" and I did a fair amount of communicating. You see X was serving his final hour of service from 9:00 to 10:00 and he wasn't wearing a watch. So, during his final hour he asked me what time it was at least 30 times, including 10 times between 9:56 and 10:00. He also started every inquiry with the word "dude".

Between conversations with my under-age menaces to society I received some on the job training on how to drive a fork lift, which was actually pretty cool. I tried to draw on my prior fork lift experience, but since it occurred back in 1977 it wasn't really too fresh in my mind. Anyway, I practiced driving forward and backward, raising and lowering the forks, and I picked up a few things and moved them around a little. With this three minutes of training and experience I figure I'm good to go if a truck comes in next Thursday and there's nobody around but me to unload it.

The warehouse is not exactly a deluxe place to work. It's a little bit crowded, a little bit dirty, a little bit dark, and it's really, really hot. However, to cool things off there are three or four of the biggest fans you've ever seen. I think they probably use these size fans to generate the wind in the hurricane and tornado movies. With the wind chill the temperature was a very comfortable 102 degrees. Remember, it's not the heat, it's the humidity. I can't wait for next Thursday. I have some plans to reorganize the entire warehouse and automate the entire operation. I'm also thinking about putting some really cute curtains on the windows to brighten the place up a little. Tom will be so happy.

Tonight is Vicki's Bible study. I'll probably spend the evening watching the Astros and falling asleep on the couch. Life is good.

Tomorrow: Kayla arrives home for her summer externship. She'll be here for the summer, working at a speech clinic in Greatwood. Her commute will be about two minutes. By the way, does anyone know the difference between an externship and an internship? If so, please drop me a line.